LIZA MILLS: The week that changed my life

Until I work out how to fix my music player this will have to do. We listened to this song all week while we was away so it is essential that you listen to it while reading this post.

This past week five of my close friends, Seb, David, Vic, Liam and Tanya, my sister and I all went to Lorne for a small 'start of summer' holiday. For a lot of us, the time away was used to escape Melbourne and all that was hurting us back home. It was interesting to watch how people attempt to block out their real world only to have the flooding in on rare moments of weakness.

My aunt and cousin asleep when we arrived

All photos that are unbranded were taken by Seb

During our week away we stayed up late, never sleeping before 2am. We ate at the Chopstix Noodle Bar every day, getting to know the people who served us, and the music tracks they played very well.

We rode the bikes into town and one the first day I threw mine down a huge hill, being too lazy to wheel it down myself. As soon as I let go I realised the consequences of my lack of energy and I watched it flip down the hill, pulling its chain off and go crashing into someones house, just missing Liam and a glass window.

On the ride home Seb announced that we would race home. No one really took it seriously but I of course tried a little harder to stay ahead of the others. As I peddled harder and harder I could feel my lungs tighten so I slowed down and waited, giving up my place ahead of everyone else. As they passed me I realised that what I was experiencing was a lot more serious that anything I had been through in the passed few years and I quickly decided that I needed to find Liam (who had my puffer) as soon as possible. I pulled up onto the road and fell to the ground before realising that he had passed me and was on his way home. Vic found me yelling for the others and raced home to get Liam. They got to me by the time I had calmed down and on our way home we found Vic, collapsed at the side of the road in exhaustion from trying to get to me. I will be forever thankful for their help.

On Thursday I had a second asthma attack but this time it was worse. I was in the ocean with Tanya and Phoebe being pulled out by a rip when my lungs gave way to my pumping heart and almost closed completely. I began to swallow water as each wave rolled over my head and as I surfaced I searched desperately for Tanya and begged her with anxiety in my voice, to get my out or I wasn't going to make it. The worst part of it all was looking back and seeing Phoebe, struggling against the rip, being pulled out a metre with each wave. It was the scariest moment of my life when I realised I wouldn't going to be able to save her. Eventually we all got out fine but I refused to get back in the water again that week.

On Monday while the excitement built as we waited for Phoebe and Liam (and later I realised, Tanya) we went berry picking. It was the most peaceful place called "Gentle Annie". The name still makes me laugh.

Whilst we were in the supermarket I pretended I didn't have an arm and tied my sleeve up into a knot. People gave me shocked looks as I talked about my shark attack. Vic accidentally claimed she was "going to lose an arm" if she didn't put our shopping basket down. I walked off, clearly very upset. The looks we got were priceless.

We ran out of mugs

Burning off

On Thursday night after Seb and David left we decided to have a bath on the roof with the fire. It was 12 at night by the time we got up there. We sat there, Vic Liam and I and talked as the water overflowed onto the rooftop and as we watched the bright stars above us. It was the most surreal thing, sitting there between the ocean and the forest with two of my closest friends laughing beside me.

Playing happy families

They fell in love with him

Throughout the week I watched Vic and Liam quite closely. They have the most intimate and loving friendship and every time I looked over to them I felt a tightening in my chest, desperate to be apart of what they have.